4.13.2009

"Rockabilly" Batwoman?

Batwoman

Even non-nerds can appreciate that Batwoman has evolved from an afterthought to a LIPSTICK LESBIAN male fantasy afterthought (except when drawn in loving detail by Adam Hughes). Now, thanks to TOPLESS ROBOT and ROBOT 6, comes the breaking news that Batwoman (not to be confused with Batgirl -- totally different character) will wear SENSIBLE WORKBOOTS for crimefighting and, out of costume, will have a smart bob with Bettie Page bangs, a few tasteful retro tats and will start shopping at TORRID.

Marvel Divas

In the spirit of equal time, Marvel is launching Marvel Divas, which will be "frothy" and features another afterthought female character, "Firestar", who Gen Xers will remember from SPIDER-MAN AND HIS AMAZING FRIENDS WHO AREN'T POPULAR ENOUGH TO BE NAME-CHECKED IN THE TITLE, ONE OF WHOM WAS CREATED FOR THIS CRAP, AS "THE HUMAN TORCH" WAS ALREADY UNDER CONTRACT TO A DIFFERENT STUDIO TO DO A BAD TV MOVIE THAT NEVER GOT MADE AND ALSO THERE WAS PROBABLY PRESSURE FROM "FEMINISTS" TO HAVE, LIKE, A GIRL, OR SOMETHING.

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